A Tropical Vacation? Why not! – by Gina

Not long ago my family, the Grecians, took our first trip to Hawaii. We were super excited! Tropical scenery, sandy beaches, fun in the sun and luaus! But there was one consideration; my 22-year-old son Ethan has autism and has never had the joy of being in a cramped jet 40,000 feet in the air. What if he had a nuclear meltdown while we’re flying over the Pacific? What if he refused to go through the rigors of pre-flight screening? What if they confiscated his electronic devices when he needed them most? The scenarios in my head were endless.

I let those thoughts bounce around in my mind for a while. Then, after deciding that Hawaii was too grand to pass up, I went to work getting Ethan mentally prepared.

I transformed all those potential scenarios into social stories. It took a lot of time and effort, but I created social stories on everything from security searches and behavior during flight to exiting the plane and retrieving our luggage from baggage claim. We took time at home to pretend. We had fun walking through the motions of many things related to flying. I wanted to make sure Ethan knew what to expect in hopes that I could relieve any anxiety and make things as smooth as possible. We practiced for about a month, every night practicing a social story through role-playing.

Then Ethan and I visited our local airport, which is about a fifth the size of LAX. The airport employees were very supportive and understanding. We observed as people went through security. We also watched the in-flight safety video, which tied nicely into one of the social stories. We were about as prepared as we could be without actually stepping foot onto a Boeing jet.

Then the day arrived. It was finally time for the trip. We drove 2½ hours to Sacramento International Airport. I had all the social stories ready for quick access and was ready to pull them out in a moment’s notice.

Pre-flight screening went smoothly. I was concerned about how Ethan would react when he had to remove his shoes, but he did it without issue. He walked through the metal detector and it didn’t beep. No metal objects. No containers with over 6 ounces of liquid. No issues.

I had some games and activities for Ethan to work on while we waited in the terminal. That helped pass the time and kept him content while we sat there – So far so good.

After a couple hours, it was time to board. As we walked onto the plane I gave the flight attendant a “heads-up.” I disclosed that I was traveling with my son with autism and warned her that he had never been on a plane. I let her know that I wasn’t quite sure how he would react but I would do the best I could to manage his behavior. The stewardess was very sweet and compassionate. She helped Ethan feel at ease and gave him extra attention along with a pair of flight wings to commemorate his first time flying. She even allowed him to hold his phone with his movie playing while the plane lifted off into the sky.

The flight was going well. We were cozy in our seats and spirits were high. Looking out the window we saw nothing but water and sky and an occasional cloud. Then Ethan needed to use the bathroom.

Uh oh. I didn’t make a social story for the single-occupancy airplane bathroom with the toilet that flushed with hyper-speed and seemed to dump its contents into the beautiful blue sky. I knew I couldn’t go in with him. That room was far too tiny and way cramped. I could only walk him to the door and tell him what to expect.

But I didn’t know that the moment he closed the door behind himself he’d be in pitch-black darkness. Yes, that caused a bit of anxiety for him. It was obvious that he was upset and scared. Hearing the commotion the flight attendant quickly came. That’s when we learned that when the door locks the light comes on. She had a key to reopen the door if Ethan couldn’t manage to get it open. He locked it, the light came on and all was good. He had no problem reopening the door when he was finished.

It was a 5-hour flight. We finally landed and walked into the terminal of Kona International.

In Kona I realized there was yet another scenario I forgot to plan for. There was a layover to the other plane. You see we landed on the Big Island, but our tropical vacation was waiting for us on Kawai.

At this point Ethan was done flying.

I told him, “We need to take one more short airplane ride to the other island.”

“You’ll just drive there,” he retorted.

That was his way of expressing a desire to take alternative transportation. What he was really saying was, “We’ll all drive to the other island instead of getting on another plane and flying there.”

I told him we couldn’t drive because it’s over the ocean. He had a solution. He said, “You’ll take a boat.”

So I said, “There are no boats.”

“You’ll take a train,” he replied.

At this point I was on the verge of panic. Would he board the plane to Kawai? Would he throw a huge fit right here in the middle of the airport with kicking and screaming and crying? Remember, Ethan is essentially a child inside a grow man’s body.

Then an idea popped into my head. I pulled out my iPhone and showed him Google earth. I showed him the islands, where we were, and where we needed to go. He saw the water in between and he saw that it was a short trip.

Then he decided he would get on one last plane, but insisted I set a timer. I thought to myself, “Oh my goodness, if we don’t land when the timer ends we’re in big trouble!” I set the timer (with some extra minutes as a buffer) and pulled out the social story about boarding the plane. And again, away we went!

The whole trip was quite an experience. It took a lot of planning, preparation, and practicing, but it was worth every second of time it took! I truly thought I would never be able to take Ethan on a plane because of his behavior, but he proved me wrong.

Overall he did great! He was able to experience a beautiful part of our country and open up more doors for adventures to come. So don’t be afraid! Just go for it! But make sure to plan ahead.